Time for another world famous "John reviews a movie based on its preview".
I was trying to avoid this one because it looks so bad, but it would be irresponsible to do so.
This movie is about Aztec Chihuahuas that are going to sing and dance for 2+ hours. In case you were curious, they fully intend to bang each other as was noted by the 50% lover part. I am also assuming that since the Chihuahua has a spanish accent but raps as though he was from the streets that he is based on Gerardo.
Bonus points if you knew who Gerardo was before watching the video. I never realized how filthy the lyrics to this song were.
Please note that in the preview it did not say "Disney Proudly Presents" in the voiceover which is common for Disney movies. Even they know its gonna suck.
The movie posters for this don't help answer any questions at all either. Sorry I link to these instead of posting them here, I just have no idea how to do it without it screwing everything up.
Poster 1
http://movies.about.com/od/beverlyhillschihuahua/ig/Beverly-Hills-Chihuahua-Poster/beverlyhillschihuahuaposter2.htm
OK, I know how big Chihuahuas are. Excellent.
Poster 2
http://movies.about.com/od/beverlyhillschihuahua/ig/Beverly-Hills-Chihuahua-Poster/beverlyhillschihuahuaposter4.htm
This tells me that the Chihuahua wants to fight me or is asking me if I literally want some of him. Which seems strange considering the other poster informed me that he was already little and probably doesn't have much to give.
Poster 3
http://movies.about.com/od/beverlyhillschihuahua/ig/Beverly-Hills-Chihuahua-Poster/beverlyhillschihuahuaposter3.htm
I now know I need to kill myself on Sept 25.
Follow up: Apparently the release date was pushed back a week. Giving me another week to live. Thanks Disney.
8.20.2008
8.12.2008
Madden Curse Came Early This Year
With Brett Favre going to the Jets, we have (I believe) the earliest fulfillment of the Madden Curse. Usually the injury or fluke circumstance that ruins a season doesn't happen until a couple weeks in. I am glad fate is getting more efficient.
Yes, Favre going to the Jets is a curse. He needs to learn a whole new set of plays, receivers, has a new offenseive line, and will be in a tougher division. I would be shocked if he had a good year. The other side note to this curse is he damaged his legacy. He did. Let's be upfront about that. This whole situation is awkward and has happened too many times for it not to change the way people think about him.
I hope the new Madden is good. So far I have heard good things.
8.10.2008
Quick Note About the Recap Below
There are a bunch of youtube videos embedded here. It takes a little while to load.
4th Annual Lollapalooza Recap/Review Party
Here is my annual recap of Lollapalooza, a 3 day music festival in Chicago. I have gone every year. I have written a recap every year.
First off, what am I writing about. Not just the bands and how they were, but the experience itself. Ergo, there might be some unrelated comments, so just bear with me. I admit I am biased by bands I like vs ones I have never heard, so please consider that and I will note it as needed.
My grading system is schoolish
A = I would actively find when this band is doing another show and pay to see them
B = If someone invited me I would probably go
C = I would probably agree to go see them then flake at the last minute
D = I would simply say “no” if invited to see them
F = I would be so insulted you thought I would even remotely consider seeing them that it is not unlikely that I will punch you in the face and/or end whatever relationship we have
+/- applies in this as well. It’s important to note I am not a big concert person. I prefer listening to recorded albums, so to earn an A you have to be pretty good at something.
For organizational sake I have included the day by day recaps in separate posts below. I had the foresight to post day 3 first so it would appear last.
Me = Genius.
I also put the time someone performed so you can get an idea of how sober/sunstroked I was when I wrote it. This year I included links to youtube or elsewhere so you can hear some samples.
At the end I will close out some thoughts and also provide a list of bands I happened to hear (either because I caught the end of their set waiting for another band or walked by their stage) and want to learn more about.
Live the dream.
Lollapalooza Day 1: Time at fest 12:30pm-10pm
See Above for grading meanings. See below for the review.
12:45pm - Already very sweaty. Festival is already very crowded. Already drinking beer. Lollapalooza 08 is a go!
1:15pm – Rogue Wave: A
One of my favorite bands so I am a little biased. These guys sounded great and did a really good set. They started a bit slow but closed it out perfectly with a Lake Michigan – Harmonium one two punch.
Sound isn’t as good on these videos as it was live.
Lake Michigan
Harmonium
They had a weird time slot considering they are popular. Going theory is festival organizers knew they would get people out but weren’t big enough to be insulted by this time slot.
Rogue Wave sez: “Thanks! We redheads need to stick together. Even though we only have one redheaded band member. And one with a cool beardstache.”
2:15pm - The Go! Team: B+
See these guys do a live show. They bounce around like maniacs and demand the audience do the same. Poppy type of music. Even though it was 300 degrees the audience was totally into it.
This is from Glastonbury, but has better sound than any Lolla videos
After this set some older guy (prob 45) who was 5’4”, overweight, balding, and probably a little drunk was talking to anyone around him about The Go! Team and how great they are. He also suggested everyone see CSS. Sorry, buddy, last time I went where a drunk middle aged dude suggested… well, let’s just say the free candy was the only good part.
The Go! Team sez: “That dude weirds us out too.”
3:15pm – Duffy: F-
Sounded awful. Was boring between songs. Really nothing redeeming about her set. I am consciously not linking to anything on her because I don’t want to ruin your day.
Dufffy sez: “Ouch!”
4:15pm - Gogol Bordello: A-
For me they are A- just because I am lazy about going to see shows. For you they should be an A++++ and immediately on your list of bands to see perform live. They play gypsy punk, which is becoming surprisingly popular. Fine by me. I like gypsy punk.
They were energetic, eclectic, and made you feel ok about going absolutely bananas in public. Basically, exactly what a festival band should be.
Gogol Bordello sez: “Rishtag Weeehawg!” or some other indiscernible thing really loudly.
5:45pm – Grizzly Bear: B+
For you I would say B-. I know, what’s the point of this system if I have to keep translating. Here’s the thing: they sound great, they are just more mellow. Not so much so that it sucked, but they are a smaller venue band. So the grade varies based on venue. They can play live. Don’t doubt that. Just know you are getting what their album sounds like. Which is mellow. My first very disjointed paragraph. Yay!
Sorry, couldn’t find any other good live performances
Grizzly Bear sez: “Come on, man. We gave you ‘Horn of Plenty’, which is one of your favorite albums ever. You couldn’t at least give us an A-?”
John sez: “Sorry, Grizzly Bear. I have to be ethical about this. I still love you.”
6:15pm – The Raconteurs: Whoops
I am not sure quite how this happened, but I basically missed their set. Probably because I had to walk across the fest after being guaranteed to miss the first 15 minutes. Then I needed a rib sandwich. Then I sat off to the side behind the stage to take a little break. Then next thing I knew, I had only listened to a couple songs. I will say this based on seeing them before. They are awesome live. Go see them.
Hate to link to such a mainstream song, but best I could find.
The Raconteurs sez: “We don’t care that you missed our set because we hate you as a person.”
8pm – Radiohead: A+
Soooooo, you could argue that OK Computer or The Bends was one of the best albums of the last 20 years and they were both made by one band. Also note their other albums include Kid A, Pablo Honey, and Hail to the Thief amongst others.
That is maniacal.
Some people complained that it was just them standing and playing. I disagree, they had laser lights and other things to entertain your eyes. The other thing is, the music does the work for a band like this. Their songs are so intense that it is hard not to get swept up in their show. See them sooner rather than later. They are an incredible band and sounded awesome live.
A little outdated, but you get the idea of how awesome they are
Also worth noting; there was a guy in the beer line who had a Pablo Honey tour shirt on. He was probably early 40’s. Graying a bit. I have never been so jealous of someone. Can you imagine loving Radiohead that much when that came out then they follow it up consistently with dynamite albums? Not only loving them that much, but being aged enough to truly understand the band and not just have a teenage crush on them.
Bonus video for the Pablo Honey T-shirt guy even though this isn't from the album Pablo Honey but it is one of their best songs and they played it at Lolla.
Radiohead Sez: “Thanks for the nice words. We couldn’t quite hear you because we were under a huge pile of money and women and talent. But we’re sure they were very nice.”
Pablo Honey Tour Shirt Guy Sez: “Some weird dude just cornered me and kept talking about The Go! Team. It was awkward. Oh, and scroll down for the Day 2 recap.”
Better do what he says. He knows how to pick 'em.
12:45pm - Already very sweaty. Festival is already very crowded. Already drinking beer. Lollapalooza 08 is a go!
1:15pm – Rogue Wave: A
One of my favorite bands so I am a little biased. These guys sounded great and did a really good set. They started a bit slow but closed it out perfectly with a Lake Michigan – Harmonium one two punch.
Sound isn’t as good on these videos as it was live.
Lake Michigan
Harmonium
They had a weird time slot considering they are popular. Going theory is festival organizers knew they would get people out but weren’t big enough to be insulted by this time slot.
Rogue Wave sez: “Thanks! We redheads need to stick together. Even though we only have one redheaded band member. And one with a cool beardstache.”
2:15pm - The Go! Team: B+
See these guys do a live show. They bounce around like maniacs and demand the audience do the same. Poppy type of music. Even though it was 300 degrees the audience was totally into it.
This is from Glastonbury, but has better sound than any Lolla videos
After this set some older guy (prob 45) who was 5’4”, overweight, balding, and probably a little drunk was talking to anyone around him about The Go! Team and how great they are. He also suggested everyone see CSS. Sorry, buddy, last time I went where a drunk middle aged dude suggested… well, let’s just say the free candy was the only good part.
The Go! Team sez: “That dude weirds us out too.”
3:15pm – Duffy: F-
Sounded awful. Was boring between songs. Really nothing redeeming about her set. I am consciously not linking to anything on her because I don’t want to ruin your day.
Dufffy sez: “Ouch!”
4:15pm - Gogol Bordello: A-
For me they are A- just because I am lazy about going to see shows. For you they should be an A++++ and immediately on your list of bands to see perform live. They play gypsy punk, which is becoming surprisingly popular. Fine by me. I like gypsy punk.
They were energetic, eclectic, and made you feel ok about going absolutely bananas in public. Basically, exactly what a festival band should be.
Gogol Bordello sez: “Rishtag Weeehawg!” or some other indiscernible thing really loudly.
5:45pm – Grizzly Bear: B+
For you I would say B-. I know, what’s the point of this system if I have to keep translating. Here’s the thing: they sound great, they are just more mellow. Not so much so that it sucked, but they are a smaller venue band. So the grade varies based on venue. They can play live. Don’t doubt that. Just know you are getting what their album sounds like. Which is mellow. My first very disjointed paragraph. Yay!
Sorry, couldn’t find any other good live performances
Grizzly Bear sez: “Come on, man. We gave you ‘Horn of Plenty’, which is one of your favorite albums ever. You couldn’t at least give us an A-?”
John sez: “Sorry, Grizzly Bear. I have to be ethical about this. I still love you.”
6:15pm – The Raconteurs: Whoops
I am not sure quite how this happened, but I basically missed their set. Probably because I had to walk across the fest after being guaranteed to miss the first 15 minutes. Then I needed a rib sandwich. Then I sat off to the side behind the stage to take a little break. Then next thing I knew, I had only listened to a couple songs. I will say this based on seeing them before. They are awesome live. Go see them.
Hate to link to such a mainstream song, but best I could find.
The Raconteurs sez: “We don’t care that you missed our set because we hate you as a person.”
8pm – Radiohead: A+
Soooooo, you could argue that OK Computer or The Bends was one of the best albums of the last 20 years and they were both made by one band. Also note their other albums include Kid A, Pablo Honey, and Hail to the Thief amongst others.
That is maniacal.
Some people complained that it was just them standing and playing. I disagree, they had laser lights and other things to entertain your eyes. The other thing is, the music does the work for a band like this. Their songs are so intense that it is hard not to get swept up in their show. See them sooner rather than later. They are an incredible band and sounded awesome live.
A little outdated, but you get the idea of how awesome they are
Also worth noting; there was a guy in the beer line who had a Pablo Honey tour shirt on. He was probably early 40’s. Graying a bit. I have never been so jealous of someone. Can you imagine loving Radiohead that much when that came out then they follow it up consistently with dynamite albums? Not only loving them that much, but being aged enough to truly understand the band and not just have a teenage crush on them.
Bonus video for the Pablo Honey T-shirt guy even though this isn't from the album Pablo Honey but it is one of their best songs and they played it at Lolla.
Radiohead Sez: “Thanks for the nice words. We couldn’t quite hear you because we were under a huge pile of money and women and talent. But we’re sure they were very nice.”
Pablo Honey Tour Shirt Guy Sez: “Some weird dude just cornered me and kept talking about The Go! Team. It was awkward. Oh, and scroll down for the Day 2 recap.”
Better do what he says. He knows how to pick 'em.
Lollapalooza Day 2: Time at Fest 2pm-9pm
2:30pm - Dierks Bentley: B+
Let’s be upfront. I don’t like country in general. I like Alt country (Bright Eyes, Nickel Creek, Iron & Wine might fit in this category). Howevs, this was an awesome show. The fans who were there because they love Dierks. Which means a lot of rowdy cheering and stomping. The band sounded really good and the music was something you could dance to. Also, bonus points to Dierks for laughing at the general Lollapalooza sentiment of “Who the hell is Dierks Bentley?” More bonus points because there was an onstage appearance of ubiquitous red cup of Hot Chicks With Douchebags fame (www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com).
Sadly, this was the best I could find
Dierks Bentley Sez: “Thanks for the nice words, John. I know you were only there because someone asked you to go and that you will only ever see me again because that same person will probably buy you a ticket. But that’s alright. Now let’s go get a cold beer and some women!”
3:30pm – Devotchka: B
Gypsy rock is the new black.
Devotchka is most well known for creating the majority of the Little Miss Sunshine soundtrack. I like their music a lot. They sounded good, but for a fest they just aren’t a huge energy band. God love ‘em they tried. But a 125lb woman playing a tuba can only jump up and down for so long before she’ll wear herself out.
I would close your eyes for this video. I don’t want to be partially responsible for causing a seizure.
Devotchka sez: “She’s only 110lbs. You cock.”
3:30pm – MGMT: A
And we have hit the first time I get to admit I left one band to go see another. Not the first or last time I will get to say that. These guys are awesome. Tons of energy. Sound great. Have a lot of really good music that you can either sit and relax to enjoy or jump around like a madman. Bonus points to this set because it helped prove my “no matter how much space is around you people will find a way to run into you” theory. Basically, I was way back from the stage relaxing and people still almost ran into me. Ridiculous.
I think this guy accidentally made one of the greatest music videos of all time.
MGMT sez: “We’re always ready to help prove scientific theories.”
4:30pm – Brand New: D-
Hi. We’re Brand New. The band. We have two drummers and 5 guitarists. But here’s what so cool. We’re all playing the same notes.
John sez: “Ugh I hated these guys. I hope they don’t read this an come hurt me.”
4:30pm – Explosions in the Sky: A+
I needed something to forget I ever saw Brand New. Enter Explosions in the Sky. They were very Sigur Ros-ian in that they had no words, just pure music. The one difference being Sigur Ros has a dude sing gibberish. Explosions might want to look into that, it actually adds a lot. But these guys sounded amazing. No doubt they can rock out. I didn’t mean to rhyme that line. Unfortunately I am using a typewriter and to go back and edit would involve me retyping all these words and html code. Sorry.
Sigur Ros for a point of comparison
This reminds me how much I miss the show “Reverb” that was on HBO. It is one of my all time favorites. I found a ton of bands I love through that show. Please bring it back HBO. I’ll kiss you.
Explosions in the Sky sez: “We don’t need a lead singer singing gibberish. That’s so Icelandic… Ya know. Cuz Sigur Ros is from Iceland… Oh what’s the point?” (sound of footsteps walking away)
5:30pm - Okkervil River: A+
This was the band I was most nervous about being disappointed in. I love Black Sheep Boy (album) but hadn’t really heard anything else. They sounded amazing. Nothing got lost in translation in the live show including lead singer Will Sheff’s maniacally desperate sing/scream voice.
Bonus points for having a disinterested woman playing guitar on stage who apparently is not a member of the band. Mystery women!
They also played my favorite song by them. No one else I know seems to like it. Take a listen and you judge. It is called “For Real”.
Here is one of their live performances. They didn’t play anything this slow. Just the best I could find that illustrates how good they sound live.
Worth noting there was a couple of dudes in front of us (and I mean they were dudes who were also a couple) and one of them was this little guy from the Phillipines who weirded me out. He was about 5ft tall, completely jacked and reminded me a lot of little superstar.
The key difference being little superstar wasn’t with his lover (maybe) and little superstar was able to have both feet on the ground at the same time. This dude was constantly on the toes of one of his feet while the other was on the ground.
The best part is I am pretty sure he knew my friend and I were laughing at him so he kept giving me menacing looks. It really didn’t help that he was between me and the jumbotron so he easily could have thought I was staring at him.
Litte Philipino man, I wasn’t staring at you, I promise.
Okkervil River sez: “We don’t know who that girl was. She just showed up with a guitar. We thought you knew her.”
Little Philipino Man sez: “I watch you when you sleep.”
Yikes.
6:30pm – Lupe Fiasco: A+
I know. 3 A+’s in a row? It seems like I turned into a kindergarten teacher who is grading whether or not you colored between the lines but you have to believe me that this was a scheduling thing. Pure coincidence. I have never been as happy at a music thing as I was during this almost 3 hours of Lolla.
Lupe is awesome. He has so much energy on stage. He is all over the place and sounds amazing. I have nothing else to say. Go see the best MC (rapper? Hip hop artist?) that is on the stages today. Yes I said that. Deal with it.
This is from ’07 Lollapalooza. Sorry for the long intro
Confession time: I saw one song of Broken Social Scene before heading to Lupe Fiasco. I didn’t review BSS here because they would have broken my string of A+’s. I didn’t want that to happen for one song from a band I genuinely enjoy. Go see BSS live. They are a great band.
Lupe Fiasco sez: “We should be friends. I think we would get along great and have a lot of fun.”
Broken Social Scene sez: “How could you do this to your Canadian brethren? … Of course you’re Canadian… Wow… You’re not? Now we don’t know what to think.”
Here is where Day 2 ends. Why? Because I was walking around talking to friends for the remaining 90 minutes I was there. I caught little snippets here and there but nothing I feel I could actually write something about in a fair way to the bands. Also, after this series of awesomeness I couldn’t really handle anything else.
Let’s wrap Day 2 up lightening round style with comments from bands that I ignored at the end of the day:
Sharon Jones sez: “I’m sorry Duffy ruined this style of music for you. Maybe Mark Ronson will redeem your faith.”
Toadies sez: “Screw you for hating us. We were an important band. Just because we look like the guy obsessed The Go! Team doesn’t give you have the right to judge us.”
DJ Momjeans sez: “I’m Danny Masterson! Admit it, the word momjeans is pretty incredible.” (John nods and points to nose)
Wilco sez: “Why can’t you get into us? We don’t understand it and it is starting to get really annoying. I think it’s about time you gave us another try.”
Rage Against the Machine sez: “You’re gonna regret not seeing us live when you had the chance.”
Rage is probably right. Let’s hope I didn’t repeat the mistake on Day 3.
Suspense!
Let’s be upfront. I don’t like country in general. I like Alt country (Bright Eyes, Nickel Creek, Iron & Wine might fit in this category). Howevs, this was an awesome show. The fans who were there because they love Dierks. Which means a lot of rowdy cheering and stomping. The band sounded really good and the music was something you could dance to. Also, bonus points to Dierks for laughing at the general Lollapalooza sentiment of “Who the hell is Dierks Bentley?” More bonus points because there was an onstage appearance of ubiquitous red cup of Hot Chicks With Douchebags fame (www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com).
Sadly, this was the best I could find
Dierks Bentley Sez: “Thanks for the nice words, John. I know you were only there because someone asked you to go and that you will only ever see me again because that same person will probably buy you a ticket. But that’s alright. Now let’s go get a cold beer and some women!”
3:30pm – Devotchka: B
Gypsy rock is the new black.
Devotchka is most well known for creating the majority of the Little Miss Sunshine soundtrack. I like their music a lot. They sounded good, but for a fest they just aren’t a huge energy band. God love ‘em they tried. But a 125lb woman playing a tuba can only jump up and down for so long before she’ll wear herself out.
I would close your eyes for this video. I don’t want to be partially responsible for causing a seizure.
Devotchka sez: “She’s only 110lbs. You cock.”
3:30pm – MGMT: A
And we have hit the first time I get to admit I left one band to go see another. Not the first or last time I will get to say that. These guys are awesome. Tons of energy. Sound great. Have a lot of really good music that you can either sit and relax to enjoy or jump around like a madman. Bonus points to this set because it helped prove my “no matter how much space is around you people will find a way to run into you” theory. Basically, I was way back from the stage relaxing and people still almost ran into me. Ridiculous.
I think this guy accidentally made one of the greatest music videos of all time.
MGMT sez: “We’re always ready to help prove scientific theories.”
4:30pm – Brand New: D-
Hi. We’re Brand New. The band. We have two drummers and 5 guitarists. But here’s what so cool. We’re all playing the same notes.
John sez: “Ugh I hated these guys. I hope they don’t read this an come hurt me.”
4:30pm – Explosions in the Sky: A+
I needed something to forget I ever saw Brand New. Enter Explosions in the Sky. They were very Sigur Ros-ian in that they had no words, just pure music. The one difference being Sigur Ros has a dude sing gibberish. Explosions might want to look into that, it actually adds a lot. But these guys sounded amazing. No doubt they can rock out. I didn’t mean to rhyme that line. Unfortunately I am using a typewriter and to go back and edit would involve me retyping all these words and html code. Sorry.
Sigur Ros for a point of comparison
This reminds me how much I miss the show “Reverb” that was on HBO. It is one of my all time favorites. I found a ton of bands I love through that show. Please bring it back HBO. I’ll kiss you.
Explosions in the Sky sez: “We don’t need a lead singer singing gibberish. That’s so Icelandic… Ya know. Cuz Sigur Ros is from Iceland… Oh what’s the point?” (sound of footsteps walking away)
5:30pm - Okkervil River: A+
This was the band I was most nervous about being disappointed in. I love Black Sheep Boy (album) but hadn’t really heard anything else. They sounded amazing. Nothing got lost in translation in the live show including lead singer Will Sheff’s maniacally desperate sing/scream voice.
Bonus points for having a disinterested woman playing guitar on stage who apparently is not a member of the band. Mystery women!
They also played my favorite song by them. No one else I know seems to like it. Take a listen and you judge. It is called “For Real”.
Here is one of their live performances. They didn’t play anything this slow. Just the best I could find that illustrates how good they sound live.
Worth noting there was a couple of dudes in front of us (and I mean they were dudes who were also a couple) and one of them was this little guy from the Phillipines who weirded me out. He was about 5ft tall, completely jacked and reminded me a lot of little superstar.
The key difference being little superstar wasn’t with his lover (maybe) and little superstar was able to have both feet on the ground at the same time. This dude was constantly on the toes of one of his feet while the other was on the ground.
The best part is I am pretty sure he knew my friend and I were laughing at him so he kept giving me menacing looks. It really didn’t help that he was between me and the jumbotron so he easily could have thought I was staring at him.
Litte Philipino man, I wasn’t staring at you, I promise.
Okkervil River sez: “We don’t know who that girl was. She just showed up with a guitar. We thought you knew her.”
Little Philipino Man sez: “I watch you when you sleep.”
Yikes.
6:30pm – Lupe Fiasco: A+
I know. 3 A+’s in a row? It seems like I turned into a kindergarten teacher who is grading whether or not you colored between the lines but you have to believe me that this was a scheduling thing. Pure coincidence. I have never been as happy at a music thing as I was during this almost 3 hours of Lolla.
Lupe is awesome. He has so much energy on stage. He is all over the place and sounds amazing. I have nothing else to say. Go see the best MC (rapper? Hip hop artist?) that is on the stages today. Yes I said that. Deal with it.
This is from ’07 Lollapalooza. Sorry for the long intro
Confession time: I saw one song of Broken Social Scene before heading to Lupe Fiasco. I didn’t review BSS here because they would have broken my string of A+’s. I didn’t want that to happen for one song from a band I genuinely enjoy. Go see BSS live. They are a great band.
Lupe Fiasco sez: “We should be friends. I think we would get along great and have a lot of fun.”
Broken Social Scene sez: “How could you do this to your Canadian brethren? … Of course you’re Canadian… Wow… You’re not? Now we don’t know what to think.”
Here is where Day 2 ends. Why? Because I was walking around talking to friends for the remaining 90 minutes I was there. I caught little snippets here and there but nothing I feel I could actually write something about in a fair way to the bands. Also, after this series of awesomeness I couldn’t really handle anything else.
Let’s wrap Day 2 up lightening round style with comments from bands that I ignored at the end of the day:
Sharon Jones sez: “I’m sorry Duffy ruined this style of music for you. Maybe Mark Ronson will redeem your faith.”
Toadies sez: “Screw you for hating us. We were an important band. Just because we look like the guy obsessed The Go! Team doesn’t give you have the right to judge us.”
DJ Momjeans sez: “I’m Danny Masterson! Admit it, the word momjeans is pretty incredible.” (John nods and points to nose)
Wilco sez: “Why can’t you get into us? We don’t understand it and it is starting to get really annoying. I think it’s about time you gave us another try.”
Rage Against the Machine sez: “You’re gonna regret not seeing us live when you had the chance.”
Rage is probably right. Let’s hope I didn’t repeat the mistake on Day 3.
Suspense!
Lollapalooza Day 3: Time at Fest 12:30pm-10pm
Here it is. Day 3. Always a day of mixed emotions. Exhaustion from the previous 2 days. Excitement at the prospect of seeing acts that top what I have already seen. Sadness that the greatest weekend every year is coming to a close. Sigh. Guess we will dive in.
1:15pm – The Weakerthans: N/A
Um… they didn’t show up. Apparently they had travel problems? Or something… I dunno, I’m not gonna hold it against them because they are one of my favorite bands.
What sucked is they had this crappy timeslot that made me get to the fest 3 hours before Iron & Wine (the next band I wanted to see) when I was still extremely tired and hungover from the day/night before. And it was 100 degrees outside. Let’s just say I was a little grumpy.
This is what I could have enjoyed
The Weakerthans sez: “It’s hard to get to the states from Canada. You know what we’re talking about… You don’t?... But aren’t you?... You’re not Canadian?... But BSS said… Now we don’t know what to think.”
2pm – The nap I took on a park bench in the shade: B
I’ve had better naps. Even better naps in public. The thing that saved this nap from a lower grade is that it probably salvaged the rest of my day. I felt good enough afterwards that I was able to enjoy the rest of my day.
Nap sez: “I’m always here to help.”
4:15pm – Iron & Wine: A+
I love Sam Beam. Beard and all. He is probably the most underrated guitarist out there. He gets so much sound from just himself and the guitar. I saw Iron & Wine a couple years ago at Lolla and couldn’t make it through 2 songs. Not because he was bad. He was playing basically an acoustic song not far from a DJ stage and you could barely hear and enjoy him.
My hopes weren’t high going in.
And boy was I wrong! They were great. Super great. He played electric and they basically had a full band as opposed to just playing the acoustic.
Here is what impressed me the most. He played my favorite song (which by the way, I had amazing luck with hearing my favorite song by all the bands I knew), which is “Upward over the Mountain”.
The recorded version is super mellow and very acoustic.
This is the version they played
Just oozed awesome and talent. Go see it.
Iron & Wine sez: “Hey John. I like your beard. Keep up the good work.”
Yes, sir!
6:15pm – Gnarls Barkley: B+
Don’t own any of their albums but always enjoy watching them perform live. They wear fun outfits and just have a good time on stage. A couple years ago they wore tennis outfits. This year they looked like college professors with sweater vests and khakis. I heard they dressed like Jedis one time.
I also love them because they do covers of songs. Here is a Radiohead cover they have been doing lately.
Real quick side note: Why doesn’t Microsoft Word recognize the word Jedi? Wait. Apparently it does, just not the plural version. Sorry about that.
To get us back on track, I will share a story from Lollapalooza 2006. I was watching Gnarls Barkley and Cee Lo (lead singer) was talking to the crowd between songs and said “Now ladies, don’t be shy about whipping out them titties.” Right after saying that they cut to a crowd shot on the jumbotron and there were a couple girls who were not entertained at all. One comment lost half the crowd. It was awesome.
Gnarls Barkley sez: “We dressed as Star Wars character for the MTV awards. Unfortunately because of corporations you can’t watch the video on youtube. Now let’s see those titties.” (John lifts shirt slowly while crying quietly)
7:15pm – The National: B-
I only saw a couple of their songs. Amazingly I still got to hear Fake Empire (my favorite of theirs) even though I only saw the last 15 minutes of their set. I really like this band. I really like their album. But nothing really jumped out for me in their live show. They sounded great but their music doesn’t lend itself to a full spectacle.
The National sez: “It must have been hard to judge our set since you were in a beer line on the opposite side of the field we were playing to.”
8:15pm – Nine Inch Nails: C
In all reality it probably isn’t fair to review them. I only saw 2 of their songs from one of the worst vantage points possible. From what I heard from other people, they were awesome. I just saw them kinda standing around and playing. Again, only saw a couple songs of theirs.
This is actually just an excuse to call out one of the biggest douchebags I have ever seen. Ya see, I was in the lolla lounge and I found a nice little spot I could watch some show. Near me is a dude in a polo and khaki shorts, clearly was in a frat in 1995 and probably thought all the kids who listened to NIN at the time were a “bunch of freaked out queers” but at the same time “would love to lay the wood to those slutted out chicks they’re rolling with even though they probably drink blood and cut themselves and other weird freak shit”.
Back to the topic. This preppy douchebag, who is clearly drunk, is calling over to a friend of his sitting by the fence. Next to his friend is a woman (late 20’s, maybe early 30’s) who thought he was talking to her for a second. Now, this lady, who was definitely there with a dude, was very normal. I mean she wasn’t sauced, clearly wasn’t looking to bang anyone. Just there for the concert.
After this woman thought prepdouche was talking to her, he turned into a shark and he smelled blood. He clarified he wasn’t talking to her, but could. Then said she should drink more because then he gets cuter. Then he said it again. Then a third time. Possibly a fourth. She made it pretty clear she wasn’t looking to make friends. Just kept saying no thanks, etc. Never one to quit or take a clue, he walked up to her with a beer which she politely declined. He came back and probably started thinking about the list of baby names for their future children.
I’m really not doing this story justice. Just believe me when I tell you that a total chode proved he was a total chode. I also appreciated how often he gave me dirty looks as if to say “Who let you in here?” Man, there was a whole group of these people. It was unbelievable. Also, the sound sucked in the lounge on that side and one of his buddies (Moose or Chet or something) kept yelling “Turn it up!” Um, they can’t hear you. You’re just ruining this for all of us. Also, if you were that concerned, why not actually go into the crowd with the normal folk.
OK enough of that.
NIN sez: “We hate that preppy guy. You did a bad job capturing what a dipshit he was.”
Prepdouche sez: “That chick was into me, bro! She was all like, ‘do me.’ And I was like ‘no way skank!’”
8:30pm – Kanye West: A+
Sunday was a huge letdown. Outside of Iron & Wine and Gnarls Barkley, nothing really stood out. Plus it was so crowded that it was hard to enjoy the fest. I couldn’t even see Girl Talk because they were on a small stage and the crowd was too thick. I thought about leaving at 6:30.
Thankfully I didn’t. Kanye was awesome and cleansed a crappy day with an awesome show. The thing that surprised and disappointed me was he didn’t have any special guests. What with all the other bands that played over the three days I thought maybe someone would pop by.
I probably got my hopes up thinking that Pharrell might fly in and Lupe and Thom Yorke stuck around for a couple days so this could happen.
Alas, no luck. However, to cap off my favorite song streak they did do Flashing Lights. Which isn’t much of a surprise.
While looking for clips I realized he played a lot of my favorites. I think New Workout Plan was the only one he didn’t do for me. Thanks Kanye.
Surprised there was no encore. He just went straight til 10pm. Really good show.
Kanye West sez: “That’s all you have to say? That’s it? You barely even complimented me. And what’s this I hear about you saying Lupe is the best MC out there? Don’t run away from me, I’m talking to you!”
Well, that’s the recap. See below for the closing thoughts.
1:15pm – The Weakerthans: N/A
Um… they didn’t show up. Apparently they had travel problems? Or something… I dunno, I’m not gonna hold it against them because they are one of my favorite bands.
What sucked is they had this crappy timeslot that made me get to the fest 3 hours before Iron & Wine (the next band I wanted to see) when I was still extremely tired and hungover from the day/night before. And it was 100 degrees outside. Let’s just say I was a little grumpy.
This is what I could have enjoyed
The Weakerthans sez: “It’s hard to get to the states from Canada. You know what we’re talking about… You don’t?... But aren’t you?... You’re not Canadian?... But BSS said… Now we don’t know what to think.”
2pm – The nap I took on a park bench in the shade: B
I’ve had better naps. Even better naps in public. The thing that saved this nap from a lower grade is that it probably salvaged the rest of my day. I felt good enough afterwards that I was able to enjoy the rest of my day.
Nap sez: “I’m always here to help.”
4:15pm – Iron & Wine: A+
I love Sam Beam. Beard and all. He is probably the most underrated guitarist out there. He gets so much sound from just himself and the guitar. I saw Iron & Wine a couple years ago at Lolla and couldn’t make it through 2 songs. Not because he was bad. He was playing basically an acoustic song not far from a DJ stage and you could barely hear and enjoy him.
My hopes weren’t high going in.
And boy was I wrong! They were great. Super great. He played electric and they basically had a full band as opposed to just playing the acoustic.
Here is what impressed me the most. He played my favorite song (which by the way, I had amazing luck with hearing my favorite song by all the bands I knew), which is “Upward over the Mountain”.
The recorded version is super mellow and very acoustic.
This is the version they played
Just oozed awesome and talent. Go see it.
Iron & Wine sez: “Hey John. I like your beard. Keep up the good work.”
Yes, sir!
6:15pm – Gnarls Barkley: B+
Don’t own any of their albums but always enjoy watching them perform live. They wear fun outfits and just have a good time on stage. A couple years ago they wore tennis outfits. This year they looked like college professors with sweater vests and khakis. I heard they dressed like Jedis one time.
I also love them because they do covers of songs. Here is a Radiohead cover they have been doing lately.
Real quick side note: Why doesn’t Microsoft Word recognize the word Jedi? Wait. Apparently it does, just not the plural version. Sorry about that.
To get us back on track, I will share a story from Lollapalooza 2006. I was watching Gnarls Barkley and Cee Lo (lead singer) was talking to the crowd between songs and said “Now ladies, don’t be shy about whipping out them titties.” Right after saying that they cut to a crowd shot on the jumbotron and there were a couple girls who were not entertained at all. One comment lost half the crowd. It was awesome.
Gnarls Barkley sez: “We dressed as Star Wars character for the MTV awards. Unfortunately because of corporations you can’t watch the video on youtube. Now let’s see those titties.” (John lifts shirt slowly while crying quietly)
7:15pm – The National: B-
I only saw a couple of their songs. Amazingly I still got to hear Fake Empire (my favorite of theirs) even though I only saw the last 15 minutes of their set. I really like this band. I really like their album. But nothing really jumped out for me in their live show. They sounded great but their music doesn’t lend itself to a full spectacle.
The National sez: “It must have been hard to judge our set since you were in a beer line on the opposite side of the field we were playing to.”
8:15pm – Nine Inch Nails: C
In all reality it probably isn’t fair to review them. I only saw 2 of their songs from one of the worst vantage points possible. From what I heard from other people, they were awesome. I just saw them kinda standing around and playing. Again, only saw a couple songs of theirs.
This is actually just an excuse to call out one of the biggest douchebags I have ever seen. Ya see, I was in the lolla lounge and I found a nice little spot I could watch some show. Near me is a dude in a polo and khaki shorts, clearly was in a frat in 1995 and probably thought all the kids who listened to NIN at the time were a “bunch of freaked out queers” but at the same time “would love to lay the wood to those slutted out chicks they’re rolling with even though they probably drink blood and cut themselves and other weird freak shit”.
Back to the topic. This preppy douchebag, who is clearly drunk, is calling over to a friend of his sitting by the fence. Next to his friend is a woman (late 20’s, maybe early 30’s) who thought he was talking to her for a second. Now, this lady, who was definitely there with a dude, was very normal. I mean she wasn’t sauced, clearly wasn’t looking to bang anyone. Just there for the concert.
After this woman thought prepdouche was talking to her, he turned into a shark and he smelled blood. He clarified he wasn’t talking to her, but could. Then said she should drink more because then he gets cuter. Then he said it again. Then a third time. Possibly a fourth. She made it pretty clear she wasn’t looking to make friends. Just kept saying no thanks, etc. Never one to quit or take a clue, he walked up to her with a beer which she politely declined. He came back and probably started thinking about the list of baby names for their future children.
I’m really not doing this story justice. Just believe me when I tell you that a total chode proved he was a total chode. I also appreciated how often he gave me dirty looks as if to say “Who let you in here?” Man, there was a whole group of these people. It was unbelievable. Also, the sound sucked in the lounge on that side and one of his buddies (Moose or Chet or something) kept yelling “Turn it up!” Um, they can’t hear you. You’re just ruining this for all of us. Also, if you were that concerned, why not actually go into the crowd with the normal folk.
OK enough of that.
NIN sez: “We hate that preppy guy. You did a bad job capturing what a dipshit he was.”
Prepdouche sez: “That chick was into me, bro! She was all like, ‘do me.’ And I was like ‘no way skank!’”
8:30pm – Kanye West: A+
Sunday was a huge letdown. Outside of Iron & Wine and Gnarls Barkley, nothing really stood out. Plus it was so crowded that it was hard to enjoy the fest. I couldn’t even see Girl Talk because they were on a small stage and the crowd was too thick. I thought about leaving at 6:30.
Thankfully I didn’t. Kanye was awesome and cleansed a crappy day with an awesome show. The thing that surprised and disappointed me was he didn’t have any special guests. What with all the other bands that played over the three days I thought maybe someone would pop by.
I probably got my hopes up thinking that Pharrell might fly in and Lupe and Thom Yorke stuck around for a couple days so this could happen.
Alas, no luck. However, to cap off my favorite song streak they did do Flashing Lights. Which isn’t much of a surprise.
While looking for clips I realized he played a lot of my favorites. I think New Workout Plan was the only one he didn’t do for me. Thanks Kanye.
Surprised there was no encore. He just went straight til 10pm. Really good show.
Kanye West sez: “That’s all you have to say? That’s it? You barely even complimented me. And what’s this I hear about you saying Lupe is the best MC out there? Don’t run away from me, I’m talking to you!”
Well, that’s the recap. See below for the closing thoughts.
To Close This Lolla Party Out
Some random tidbits.
Getting those schedules above here in was a more difficult task than should have been. But worth it because you can see how I changed things after initial thoughts.
Total time at fest: 26 hours
Money spent: Would rather not think about it.
Very well run festival with reasonable prices. I wish it wasn’t so big. Not to be that guy, but I remember the first fest in 2005 and it was better then. Smaller area, less people. Just made for a better fest.
Bands that I only caught a little of but need to check out
Noah and the Whale: Jam bandy in a good way. A little like Brian Jonestown Massacre.
Saul Williams: Hard Hip hop. They wore masks and seemed they could be crazy.
Yeasayer: Here is how you don’t introduce your band- “Their frontman is good friends with Oprah and their album was named one of the best of the year by Better Homes and Gardens…” but I like the song I heard.
Free Sol: Don’t remember why I circled them.
Booka Shade: Afro-punk kinda.
What Made Milwaukee Famous: Heard one I liked, one I didn’t
Black Kids: Only caught a snippet.
Other Random band notes
White Lies: You know who is really good at sounding like the Killers? The Killers. Please stop it, White Lies.
Chromeo: Large man please put your shirt on. Also, I don’t want to come here to watch one guy play a bass and another play a computer. That’s not fun.
Yet again have proven that people will run into me no matter how much space there is around me.
I think that’s all I got.
Lollapalooza sez: “Thanks again for coming. Could you do us a favor on your way out? This guy has been talking about The Go! Team and won’t stop. Could you just murder him for us?”
Sorry, Lollapalooza. No can do. But I’ll see you next year.
8.07.2008
New Going Theory
I don't think I will find a place for this in my Lollapalooza recap, but I have a new theory.
Not really a theory, but I get really annoyed when people somehow almost run into you despite standing still in a large open area. It is baffling to me.
Next time I am at a music festival or something, I am going to stand alone in a huge open area and count how many people come within 3 feet of me.
Should be fun.
Also, an image search for "person open field" gave me this nice lady so I decided she would help convey the fun of being outside.
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